Community Manifesto Pt 2

Hey Party People,

First off Happy Thanksgiving! Despite the craze of 2020 there is plenty to be thankful for and I hope each and every one of you is taking the time to focus on that. Focus on the things that we know we are so lucky to have. Don’t get caught up in the busyness or stress of hosting a holiday dinner, but be thankful you have food on the table, a family that get’s to be together, and another chance and another day to be here in this beautiful disaster of a world.

So last week we talked about community, more specifically an inventory of who is in our life and who we should call in to create a well-rounded support system.

This week I wanted to build on this sense of community and how to gain authentic, real, and long-standing connections. As I mentioned last week I’m in a space where I’m seeking community, I’m seeking my people, but what has manifested in my little subconscious is not about who I want but how I want them to make me feel, how they bring value to my life, and how I build those connections with others.

I’m not a super open individual. I don’t share or celebrate big wins, I don’t reach out when I’m feeling down. I’m getting better, especially since this dang pandemic, but it’s still something I struggle with – being raw, open and vulnerable with people, and I know I’m not alone. Its not easy showing others our true authentic self, whether that means our most happy self or our down in the dumps ugly crying version. There are a lot of unhappy people in this world who cannot stand when you are over the moon happy, or oozing with positivity. Believe me, I know because I’ve been that person. Further when we are down, crying, or working through some hard shit, people get uncomfortable. They don’t know what to do or say, and feel like they have to comfort you. So instead to ensure others don’t feel uncomfortable we will hide or push down our bigger, harder emotions. We will play small so others don’t feel diminished, or we will hide our sadness as not to make someone feel uncomfortable by our struggle.

But with community, with REAL connections and bonds, we won’t put those limitations on ourselves. We will show up as our most authentic self. How many people can you do that within your life? Seriously think about that… Why can you, or why can’t you? For me, in all honesty, a major limitation is myself. I am so dang stubborn and independent I keep things to myself -the good and the sad! And I think its because I don’t yet have enough of my people. The ones who really just get me, support me, and where it just feels natural to be with them. Don’t get me wrong I have some great people in my life, but I very often feel like I’m the one out there filling everyone else’s cup. And I’ve had to seriously start to consider, whose filling mine? Who are those people that fill my cup?

So as I’m seeking my community, and you yours, think about those traits you want or desire in your circle. What and who fills you up?

Further we all have to work a little more on being real. Life is full of ups and downs yet we try and coast through life like its constant. It’s never freaking constant, especially in 2020 – has there ever really been a dull moment? Seriously. So let’s be real and build connections with vulnerability and openness, ones that aren’t calculated on returns, or what you want from the other person. This is how we will build real community around us.

Let’s be authentic and in that process, we will attract our people. Those people who see you and just freaking love you for everything that you are – the goofy, the stubborn, the hilarious, the smart, the emotional, the passionate, the odd, the freaking wonder that is you. Do not become, act, or try to be anyone but yourself, and if someone doesn’t see you, want you, or choose you, they aint the right peeps for you – it really is that simple.  

 

As always here’s your kick ass party jam for the week!

          YouTube >>  Halfway Home - Jess Moskaluke

          Spotify >> Halfway Home - Jess Moskaluke

Thanks as always for having a read. I am thankful and grateful to share my perspective with you.

-S